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Leap of Faith: Chapters 5-6 August 31, 2006

Posted by Han in Leap of Faith by Queen Noor, Uncategorized.
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We are discussing chapters 5 and 6 here. Leave and check out comments below.

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1. Ashleigh - September 1, 2006

What struck me about chapter 6 was the loneliness that awaited Queen Noor in her marriage.

On page 111, she writes, “Our marriage would be one in which we would fight to find private time together amid the press of events. In fact, our bathroom would become the only reliable sanctuary for the two of us. Often it was the only place where we could talk with complete freedom.”

She continues, “Given all the stress that King Hussein had lived through and the extraordinary challenges and crises he continued to face, I determined very early in our marriage that as much as possible I would try not to add to that stress by burdening him with problems or needs of my own.”

And, in the last sentence of the chapter, she says, “After we returned to Amman from our honeymoon, I realized that I was essentially on my own.”

Personally, I can’t imagine being in a marriage where my husband and I couldn’t talk privately on a regular basis. Or where we didn’t both bear one anothers burdens. I would feel like my husband didn’t really know me if he wasn’t aware of my problems or needs. Sure, there are times I don’t tell Ted if I’m struggling with something, but for the most part I do. And I think it’s in that sharing, that making oneself vulnerable, that continually brings a husband and wife closer. I definitely wouldn’t want to be in Queen Noor’s shoes.

2. bethany3boys - September 1, 2006

Oh my goodness Ashleigh!!! I wrote down that exact quote about the bathroom!!! HOW SAD!!! I totally agree with you. How hard that would be not to be able to be alone outside the bathroom. And in a sense no wonder they couldn’t share one anothers burdens…they couldn’t really talk about them much with all those people around!! That would be such a hard aspect of living a royal or famous life. I wonder if she describes that loneliness more in the book or if she ever talks about bearing the weight of her burdens alone or if that was that and she just went on. Have to say that was one of the sadest honeymoon stories I have ever heard…didn’t really sound like a honeymoon.

I am also interested and hope she writes more about becoming a mother of all those children!! I know she touches on it a little here but really WOW!!! That is a lot of kids to suddenly be the mother of and a lot of age ranges too.

3. Jaree - September 1, 2006

I was sad for her, too … how difficult it must be to live a public life. Maybe looking at it a little differently, at least they did figure out a place where they could talk each day candidly and privately. The theme of sacrificing for their “greater family”, the citizens of Jordan, is prevalent.

Do you think lack of privacy is a cost of fame?

Should leaders put the needs of their country in front of everything, including their family?

4. Bethany - September 8, 2006

What do you all think about her view of submission? Yes there were some communication issues but she seemed very willing to submit and be a helpmate to her husband and she seemed to make that a big priority.

5. Ashleigh - September 8, 2006

I think we have to examine her view of submission in light of the Middle Eastern culture and Islam. I don’t know Muslim beliefs about submission, but it very well be that she was expected to submit in such a manner or there would be serious consequences. Any one know what Islam has to say about submission in marriage?

6. Nicole - September 10, 2006

I thought it was also so interesting that she was so willing to give up her way of life and be willing to change so quickly. Obviously it was difficult, and she shares those struggles, but there really wasn’t a question of if things were going to go her way. Obviously, she knew going into the marriage that she would be subject to rituals and traditions, but what struck me is that as independent and opinionated as she was, she didn’t enter into her marriage with the mind that she needed to change things about her husband and family. She seems very eagar to please.

7. bethany3boys - September 10, 2006

Jaree I do think that lack of privacy is a cost of fame. Really when you think about it to be famous you are allowing the public to view you and the more you allow them to view usually the more famous you become. When someone has truly “arrived” so to speak they have given up so much information that now people want to know more…and if they didn’t then they probably wouldn’t be as famous anymore. I think about how here when someone has been out of the news for awhile you start to just forget about them. Or think of the VH1 show “Where are they now?” Once they are out of that light most (not all) seem to lose their fame.

I have been thinking about your question on leaders putting the country before the needs of the family….I am still working through some thoughts on that…but my kids want to go swim now so as their leader I am going to sign off today and go take them swimming. HEE HEE.

8. Michelle - September 12, 2006

I took note of her delay in responding to the Kings proposal… taking time to consider the implications of being wife to a King.

She didn’t give up a career as much as traded it in for a position where she could do even more for the greater good of the people she had chosen to love.

She never seemed to take advantage of the money or the title of Queen to make her life more comfortable.

She choose to share her husbands time, love, and affection with the people & needs of the country.

I’ve no doubt that she practically considered the reality of such a marriage, but also that she underestimated the pressure and was surprised by the difficulties that arose so soon. However, as her story unfolds, I remember feeling confident that their marriage was strong and love was real. Perhaps the fact that they share stong beliefs and joint goals helped to strenthen their marital union.

9. anneswanson - September 13, 2006

I could not do it. I mean the sharing of my husband. I do not think I could be someone of high statures wife.
No doubt I think she realized that it would be a hard marriage, but at the same time because of her background and her life up until the marriage really it makes sense for her. She had lived a life unlike any of ours (as far as I know) and it continued on…as Queen!
“but what struck me is that as independent and opinionated as she was, she didn’t enter into her marriage with the mind that she needed to change things about her husband and family. She seems very eagar to please ” I agree Nicole…struck me too.

10. anneswanson - September 13, 2006

Found this intersing…

taken from : http://www.muslim.org

Rights of women:
No other religious book and no other reformer, religious or secular, has done one-tenth of what the Holy Quran or the Holy Prophet Muhammad has done to raise the position of women. From a material as well as a spiritual point of view, Islam recognizes the position of woman to be the same as that of man. The highest favour which God has bestowed upon mankind is the gift of Divine revelation, and we find women, as well as men, spoken of in the Quran as receiving revelation (see, for example, 3:42 and 28:7). The Quran makes no difference between man and woman in the bestowal of Divine reward for good deeds:
“Whoever does good, whether male or female, and is a believer, these shall enter the Garden (of heaven)” (40:40; see also 3:195, 4:124, 16:97 and 33:35).
Thus, according to the clearest teachings of Islam, men and women can rise to the same eminence in the moral and spiritual spheres.
On the material side too, woman is recognized as on a par with man. She can earn money and own property just as a man can do:

“For men is the benefit of what they earn, and for women is the benefit of what they earn” (4:32).

She has full control over her property and can dispose of it as she likes. In Arabia, at the time of the advent of the Holy Prophet, a woman had no rights of property; in fact, she herself was part of the inheritance, and was taken possession of along with other property. The Quran took her from this low position and raised her to a position of perfect freedom as regards her property rights and her right to inheritance, a position which, even in modern western nations, she has attained only very recently after a long struggle.

To raise the moral status of society, Islam requires both sexes to behave modestly and to develop the habit of keeping their looks cast down in the presence of each other. When going out, or on other occasions when there is intermingling of the sexes, women are required to be properly dressed,[10] and not to make a display of beauty so as to excite the passions of the other sex. With these precautions, women have every liberty to go anywhere and to do any work.

As a wife, a woman does not lose any of the rights she possesses as an individual member of society; nor is her individuality merged in that of her husband. Her position as wife, according to a Saying of the Holy Prophet, is that of “a ruler over the house of her husband”. In the matter of divorce too, which may become necessary if all means to effect reconciliation between husband and wife are exhausted, the Quran places the two parties on a level of perfect equality.

11. bethany3boys - September 14, 2006

That is really interesting Anne. I was watching this show on PBS last night…didn’t make it through the whole thing I feel asleep. 😉 But it was really interesting. It was tracing the history of the Muslim world and showing how the fanatical Islam groups started out of leaders wanting to control more. So this oppressing women is basically out of these extreme groups. They were comparing them to the KKK calling themselves Christian yet not abiding by what the bible really says and really being an extreme group yet having influence and power.

12. Seta - September 17, 2006

I haven’t gotten too far into chapter 5 yet, but one thing I found very interesting was that at the very beginning she mentions that when the King said he was going to visit her father (to ask for her hand in marriage) it had only been three weeks since she had joined her father and Marietta Tree for the audience with the King. Reading in the previous chapter about the weekend in Aqaba and the motorcycle rides and dinners and movies, I had the impression they had “dated” for many months and was completely surprised this statement.

13. Michelle - September 18, 2006

Yes… it sure was a fast courtship by any standards, wasn’t it?


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